I had a little scare last Thursday morning when I noticed some very, very faint spotting. If that's TMI, apologies, but you should know by now that I keep this as real as possible. I went about my day for a couple hours before calling the doctor, just to see if the baby continued to move like usual, or if the spotting got worse. He kept moving, and I didn't notice any more spotting at all, so the doctor told me to just rest, stay hydrated, and call back if anything seems unusual.
Everything has been status quo since then, but needless to say, that was the kick in the pants I needed to get my ass moving on preparations for Baby Mazz. I washed all the necessary baby things I could. I did at least three huge loads of baby stuff. Baby socks are the most adorable thing, and yet the fucking worst things to wash. You think you have trouble finding YOUR socks in the laundry? Baby socks are ten times worse. I can forsee a future where I drop, like, seven of them on my way up the steps and Nym eats them all before I realize I even lost them. Then, I'll search the house for hours, only to see Nym poop them out the next morning.
This is going to be my life, people.
I also packed my hospital bag and the diaper bag as well as I could this early in the game. Hopefully, I have another month to gather the rest of the things that will make our hospital stay somewhat bearable. Eric installed the car seat in my car, too. We are as ready as we can be at the moment.
I think Eric felt bad for me, so he took me out on Friday night to one of our favorite restaurants. We sat by the water with our drinks (Shirley Temple for me, because I'm hardcore like that), overlooking the Jupiter lighthouse. I know eventually we will find a new normal, where we bring a kid with us or find a sitter, but it will never be the same as it is now. Different isn't BAD, but it's... well, different. There will never be a time where we aren't thinking about him, loving him, or coming back home to him. So, we are trying to take advantage of our current normal, where we can go out spur of the moment without packing play-doh and diapers and snacks.
On Saturday night, we headed over to Ben and Kristin's to have a game night/baby shower with some of our friends. I just wanted a night where I got to hang out with a bunch of people before the baby is here (once again, our new normal will make this kind of event much different). Kristin went overboard, of course, and made it like a real themed shower, with Where The Wild Things Are stuff everywhere! I love that book, and I can already tell my kid is a Wild Thing. There were signs and favors and little cards to fill out guessing the baby's birth information. Jessica made little monster cake pops. People gave us very generous gifts. It was a really fun night, and we are very lucky to have such awesome people in our lives down here.
Sunday was a boat day, since Adam had come down from Orlando to hang out with us. The weather reports had called for rain all weekend, but it ended up being one of the most beautiful days. The water was super blue, and we saw lots of fish and a manatee! Chloe can swim around now, and she likes to build drippy castles on the sand, so it was a lot of fun hanging on "our beach" in the intracoastal. :)
The truth is that I am just not feeling great right now. I'm having fun with friends and feel happy a lot, but I also just feel mentally and physically blah. I don't like to just sit around and rest, even though I need to. I do feel purposeless, even though I have so much to do around the house. I can only do so much cleaning and organizing in a day before I want to jump out a window, and then what do I have to do? It's too hot for me to sit on the beach or by the pool, and even if it wasn't, that's still just "sitting around." I want to go for walks, but I can't walk Nym at this point. If she sees another dog, she will be too difficult for me to control. My feet swell up immediately if I walk in this heat anyway. I'm struggling with my body, because it doesn't feel like mine, and it's very uncomfortable.
I know some people have way worse pregnancies, but I just don't enjoy the general experience of being pregnant, I guess. I'm excited to meet my kid, but the whole process of getting there has been a true test of my mental and physical self.
How far along? 34 weeks 1 day, and Baby Mazz is the size of a quokka. What is it? I don't know. Google exists for a reason. The other app says butternut squash, which I actually think might be an accurate veggie description for once.
Total weight gain/measurements: I'll find out my next update at my appointment on Thursday, but I feel like a beached whale.
Maternity clothes: I ordered several nursing bras. It was time. I spent a bit on nice ones, because I read in reviews that these are the only ones people with my particular bra-fitting issues ended up being able to use. Sure enough, they are amazing, and I don't even feel frumpy or gross in them! If you don't know what nursing bras are, they are basically peek-a-boo bras, so you can whip your boobs out easily. Sounds sexy, but when you are leaking milk all over the place and your baby is crying from hunger, it's just practical. I also got my breast pump, which was completely covered by insurance! Woohoo!
Stretch marks: None yet.
Sleep: I'M HOT ALL THE TIME AND I HAVE WEIRD DREAMS AND I DO NOT SLEEP.
Best moment this week: The whole weekend with Eric and friends!
Miss anything? Alcohol, family, friends, bending over, breathing, sleeping, eating, walking, working, feeling good in general.
Movement: Still tons! I took a video, but I'm scared to post it. It looks like a creature is trying to fight its way out of my body. If you're interested in viewing my homemade sci-fi masterpiece, let me know.
Food cravings: I really, REALLY want Jupiter Donut Factory. I didn't get it this weekend. Wahhhhh.
Anything making you queasy or sick? Nothing in particular. Just not feeling well in general.
Gender: Dude.
Labour signs: Nope.
Symptoms: All the same as before, but a new one has popped up in the past week. My hands feel like I have arthritis. It is nearly impossible to bend my fingers when I wake up, and the pain lingers throughout the day, although it is worst in the morning. I looked this up, and apparently it has to do with swelling in the wrist and hands. It can cause pain and even carpel tunnel. My hands don't look super swollen, but they definitely are a little. I can't get my rings on at all anymore. :(
Belly button in or out? It's turning inside out more and more every week. I won't even have a belly button by the end of this pregnancy.
Wedding rings on or off? Off. My hand feels naked.
Happy or moody most of the time: Moody. I'm uncomfortable, and I also have zero tolerance for people's stupidity right now. Just being honest.
Looking forward to: We start hospital classes this week! Newborn Care class is tomorrow night, which I don't really need, but I think it'll be funny to watch Eric changing and bathing a doll lolllllllll. And we have an all-day Childbirth Class/Hospital Tour on Saturday, with Katie and Leo, too! I am excited for that one. :)
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